::a letter to myself::

salam.

skg sdg menghadap lappy sambil mendengar chn C867, radio Bayu. sekali sekala chn ni pasangkan lagu Dusun. terubat rindu pada Sabah, oh my homeland, i miss you so much :(

btw spt biasa jika punya kesempatan, sy akan melawat beberapa page yg sy minat. kenapa minat? entahlah. rasa best kot. antaranya ialah wtf facts. and i found this;

wow! really?! this seems fun. and suddenly sy teringat dalam series HIMYM, ada story Marshall tulis surat utk diri sendiri. HIMYM season 5, ep. 10.

but what happen to future (present) Marshall?

hahaha. welllllllllllllllllllll, sy pun masuk la ke website futureme.org and start writing letter to myself. hasilny???

tak ingat dah apa di tulis. tp apa yg sy tulis ialah target achievement sy sebelum 2020. Insha Allah kalo panjang umur, murah rezeki, 31 disember 2019 sy akan baca balik apa yg sy tulis ni. hihihi you all should do the same too!

daa.

::setiap 25hb, mostly::

alhamdulillah, hari ini bagi para penjawat awam gaji masuk (walopn tgk dlm bank on9 statement gaji i masuk 24 sept jam 00:00 am hewhehewh)

tp setiap kali gaji masuk, dalam masa yang singkat angkanya boleh berubah turun mendadak. bukan apa, bayar hutang (wink2). bayar thru cimbclicks sj, mudah, cpt dan selamat (insha Allah). mula2 login, senyum tgk amount sblh kiri. pastu, tekan bhgn pay: bills, juga bhgn 'transfer: to other banks, clicks clicks here and there, andddddd .... nah! amount mendadak berubah. my gosh i am really an adult now!

i pay rent! yes i stay in a rental house. means i live away from my family. 

i pay for my car. i own a car and i hv to pay for it starting june 2013 and for 7 years ahead.

i pay bills! water supply, broadband, astro (both astro in miri and my parent). that is at least i can do for 'em.

i go shop for groceries.

kdg2 bila baca2 my old entries, mmg x terasa btl masa berlalu. dulu masa jd student, slalu tulis 'mintak duit dari parent sbb x cukup duit sendiri', x penah rasa ada 'tanggungjawab' sgt. yala msh student kn, x ada apa sgt keperluan duit (kecuali utk shopping brg2 yg disukai mcm baju etc). x adanya bayar2 sewa umah or keta. elaun student akan dipotong rm60 setiap bulan (konon2 sewa hostel la). keta pesona yg di bawa ke hulu hilir pla daddy yg bayarkan. rumah pun bukannya jauh sgt. setakat dua jam beza, bole ulang alik tiap hari kalo mau. and memang pun masa msh study d IPG Kgau, every weekends saya balik umah (ranau). balik petang jumaat, petang ahad or subuh isnin baru balik kgau. every weekends mst ada dkt umah. but now? :(

last balik umah wkt smbut bday hjg bln ogos/early sept. lepas ni x dpt balik g smpai cuti skola. berjauhan dgn keluarga, btl2 berdiri di atas kaki sendiri. to survive alone. dgn sgla bil2 dibayar tiap bulan, btl2 terasa kehidupan seorang 'dewasa'. ada tanggungjawab. beli barang rumah. kena masak utk diri sendiri. kemas rumah sendiri. x ada mengharap weekends dpt bsenang lenang d umah tggu masakan mommy. x ada nya mharap bila sakit baju2 mommy yg tlg basuh. x adanya mharap bila sakit mommy/daddy yg kena temankan bila terjaga demam/batuk di tgh2 mlm. x ada. semua kena wat sendiri.

rasa mcm background lagu masa tulis entry ni bait2 dr lagu Taylor Swift - Never Grow Up. Listen the full version of song with lyrics here.

 Take pictures in your mind of your childhood room
Memorize what it sounded like when your dad gets home
Remember the footsteps, remember the words said
And all your little brother's favorite songs
I just realized everything I have is someday gonna be gone

So here I am in my new apartment
In a big city, they just dropped me off
It's so much colder that I thought it would be
So I tuck myself in and turn my night light on

x apa la. inilah cycle hidup manusia. alhamdulillah dpt merasa tempat org. mdh2an cpt la dpt pindah balik Sabah//Ranau to be exact. 

k la bye.

ps: bila baca entry yg lama (sila click ini), hati seyes rasa xcited. mcm darah di pam cpt ke jantung. seyes xcited. can we live in a place like this one day, B. please? (wat muka innocent). series sy sgt suka!!! 

::just a copypaste (i)::

"I pity the woman who will love you when I am done. She will show up to your first date with a dustpan and broom, ready to pick up all the pieces I left you in. She will hear my name so often it will begin to dig holes in her. That is where doubt will grow. She will look at your neck, your thin hips, your mouth,  wondering at the way I touched you. She will make you all the promises I did  and some I never could. She will hear only  the terrible stories. How I drank. How I lied.  She will wonder (as I have) how someone as wonderful as you could love a monster  like the woman who came before her. Still,  she will compete with my ghost.  She will understand why you do not look  in the back of closets. Why you are afraid of what’s under the bed. She will know every corner of you is haunted by me," — Clementine von Radics

::dilema penduduk Ranau::

salam.

perggh. tajuk mcm kes berat ja.

haha. x pyh nk dilema sgt. x la.. gambar2 d bwh ni d ambk wkt cuti raya ritu. ada g jenjalan d salah sebuah resort di Kundasang, Sabah. Jarak dr umah sy ke Kundasang dlm 20 to 25km kot. g mkn2 dgn fam sblm bpisah balik. (kami ke Swak, fam my sis ke Tawau). so g la jenjalan n mkn2 d luar. mula2 plan g Mount Kinabalu Heritage Resort & Spa (bapak la nama beriya pdhal nama lama hotel ni Hotel Perkasa, Kundasang huhu). tp tetiba dlm pjlnn daddy kata "mari kita cuba pegi Celyn Resort,". haaa smpai dkt simpang Kg Samuruh - Kinoundusan, kitaorg pun belok kiri. jalan masuk ke dalam bole tahan juga (jauh dan agak gravel). sy dh 3x kot ke sini. sekali tu ikut daddy g book tmpt utk seminar skola dia (wkt tu daddy msh mengajar d SK. Kauluan), sekali tu pegi jenjln dgn fam, n pgi kli ketiga juga dgn fam tp plus hubby =p ~ hubby n abg ipar pla baru ptama kali. tp sebelum2 ni x penah pun pegi makan dkt restoran dia. cuma pgi jenjalan ambk view. kali ni kami pegi utk mkn mlm.

walopn pjlnn agak jauh, tp berbaloi sgt3 okeh sbb mknnnya SEDAP, dan bole la di kira murah bbnding tmpt2 xclusive yg lain. n view dia pun mst la cantik n aman. Kundasang kan mmg tkenal dgn cuacanya yg sejuk dan nyaman. masa kami kecik2 umur 1 - 6 tahun pun  kami duk di Kundasang sbb daddy dlu ngajar di SK. Kundasang. sbb tulah kulit sy n kakak cerah tp my sis dah x cerah sgt da (wkwkwkwkw ble pcya ka teori nii. lalala)

pas g mkn, kami jenjalan la sekitar tu. mmg best view dia, even malam pun rs tenang dan nyaman ja. cuaca sejuk. pastu my mom ckp "ha kalo kamu (me n B) mau g honeymoon, xpyh pegi jauh2. pegi sini pun cukup da," pastu mula2 sy pn kata "yala bgs jua sni,". pastu tgk rate dia, siap ada room type g. cth, view yg mghadap pemandangan G.Kinabalu, arga dia lebeh mahal banding yg x mhdp gunung. okeh plg senang masuk website celyn resort n cek la mana2 yg bkenaan. kmi even plan mau wat family vacation di sni. bole bbq segala bagai. seems nice and fun. until,

terdetik di hati, harga utk family RM411 for ONE NIGHT.rm 400+ -_____- . jumlah tu bole da beli tiket pulang balik 3 org Miri-KK (kalo Airasia tgh promotion hoho). kalau sy ni bukan penduduk jati Ranau, mmg la sy x kisah byr mahal utk bbq n spending quality time with family d tmpt2 yg xclusive. bukannya selalu pun kannnn. mslhnya, sy ni penduduk asal ranau, yg jarak rumah dr tempat ni x jauh sgt. bole pulang balik pulak tuuuuuuu. mcm mbazir bayar mahal2 sdgkn ada umah sendiri yg pcuma x kira la brp malam pun. n lg x best, sy kiranya dah hafal n most of d place da penah pegi, paling x pun pernah lalu jalan resort2/motel2 sekitar Kundasang. warghhhhhhhhhh x adventerous sungguh! -____- . mcm x best la kn kalo kita g vacay tmpat2 yg kita dah biasa pegi, or tempat2 yg kita dah hafal jalannya. less adventure huhhh ~ (pdhal kalo sesat mst panic rsa mau nangis kn aaaaaahahaha)

Ranau sememangnya terkenal dgn kwsn2 peranginan yg best2. majoriti pnduduk berbangsa Dusun, suku kaum terbesar di Sabah. tletak di tengah2 negeri Sabah (cuba u all g cek peta Sabah, Ranau duk tgh2 okeh), Ranau sememangnya kawasan bukit/pergunungan yg best dan sesuai utk g bcuti. tempat2 lain mcm Pulau Mabul di Semporna pun lawa juga, tp......urm...huhu mcm x berapa yakin da g sna lepas kes Kiram bulan mac lepas. plus kalo g area2 Sdkn/Semporna/Tawau, susah mau bezakan mana penduduk asal, mana pddk pendatang. haih maafkn sy T_T. n lagi satu, Ranau kn duk dekat ngn gunung, jd cuaca dia mmg sejuk n nyaman mcm d Alaska (aaaaaahahaha bole camtuuuu). terutamanya kwsn mcm Kundasang, mmg tengahari 12 noon - 2 pm pun kadang x terasa kepanasan. cuaca di kira yg sedang2 sj. malam jgn ckp la, mst la sejuk! :)

kalo d Kundasang, mmg byk sgt la motel2/resort2 yg sesuai dijadikan kawasan psinggahan or honeymoon. kalo dlm pjlnn area Taman Kinabalu ke pekan Ranau, u all bole stay dkt U Merlin, Rose Cabin, Fairy Garden, Puncak Borneo, Mesilau Resort, Strawberry Garden. kalo mau resort pla, ble stay d Mesilau Resort, Celyn Resort, Dream World Resort, Kinabalu Pine Resort, or ble juga stay hotel mcm M. Kinabalu Heritage n Spa or Cottage Hotel. byk lagi kot tp sy x igt sgt. semua tempat ni best n perfect getaway for those who live in hectic city. mmg tenang, best, sejuk, bole tenangkn fikiran! come to Ranau n get ur own experience.

tapi, kalo mcm sy ni, duk Ranau, mcm x berapa mau best da kalo g tinggal d resort2 sekitar Kundasang. sbb bangun2 pagi, mst x rasa pegi mana2. rs mcm duk kwsn bdekatan. x pegi memana pun. kalo sy mau g vacay, tema lagu mst la lagu Zizan ft Kaka "Bawaku Pergi" mcm liriknya "bawaaaaaaaaa aku pergiiiiiiiii. pacu laju2 kita lari dari realitiiiiiiiiiiii" hah lbh kurg camtu laah. lari dari realiti. kalo bgn pagi2, msh bpijak di bumi sekitaran, masih berada di realiti laaaah ! =__________=

lain la kalo bgn2 pagi berada di Hong Kong ka, Ho Chi Minh ka, Hat Yai ka, Bali ka bla2. lagi best Seoul ka, Tokyo ka .. baru la lari dari realiti. x pyh beriye kot luar negara sgt. bangun2 sedar di Langkawi ka, Pulau Perhentian ka, Key Ell City ka pun da okayyy sgt. hihihi. huarghhhhhhhhhh i want a vacay but dont know when, where, with who. i want a vacay with husband and family! :) :)

hehehehheheheh. imagine jeling2 hubby. vacay / honeymoon dkt manaaaaaaaaaaaa ya =p hahahahaha. 

ok2 share sikit la gmbr2 msa dinner d Celyn Resort. oo sori, ni bkn share view ok, cuma share gambar2 sy n B. hewhewhwhewhw

but 1st, the foodies. nyummmmmmehh so good, so delicious. sedap n sgt berbaloi2 harganya.

jenjalan di kawasan sekitar lps mkn.

hahahha lucu pla tgk gmbr ni. i look cam 'oldie2 ppl' wkkwkwk

berlatarkn my parent n wizz

baby...myb we shud get one too ;p

=)

wizz n his granny

spotlighted. wizz

and masukkn la sekali gambar Wizz pakai baju panda. hahahaha omooo cutenya. baju ni my hubby belikn wkt wizz baru umur sebulan kot.hahaha masa kakak preggo dia penah request baju ni.baju ni utk baby umur 6 to 12 months. skg wizz dah muat hihihi. 

n agak kelakar sbb masuk dlm restoran d Celyn Resort tu, dpn pintu ada tulis lbh krg 'strictly no pet allowed'. rs lucu la sbb Wizz all dressed up like Panda. ni gambr smpt ambk d umah sblm gerak.

  

oh my panda!

 munggong yg cumillllllll. stoking cam tapak bulat2, n ada ekor hahahahaha

hehehehhe i miss my fam so much. dua hari lepas my sis htr video via whatsapp. wizz da pndai jalan huhu 16/9/2013 :)

k la, dats all. opps jap.

 

he..he... saja beriya. new phone. hihi thanks Love. belated gift from hubby. baru dpt pakai sbb beli number baru. mau guna simkad number lama tp x dpt sbb simkad tu dah lama.. design lama. cip dia besar. x ble dipakai utk latest hp skg ni. cip kecik. haih huhu. B da cuba potong simkad pun msh x bjaya. so i hv no choice but to bought a new number, but still msh pakai number lama. insha Allah xkn tukar number lama smpai bila2. da lama sgt guna. since 2006 kalo x silap. syg la pula kalau tukar.

n lg x paham, sy beli nombor Digi juga ahahahahaha. biasanya org ada dua number ni, beza2 line. Digi dgn Celcom ka, Digi dgn Maxis ka.. or else. tp sy tak. dua2 pakai Digi. why? bcoz dkt skola sy yg bajet pedalaman tu cuma ada line tepon n tenet Digi. hahahahaha haru x? kalo celcom, ada la juga tp kena pandai cari line. alaa mcm dulu2. kena letak satu tempat (tinggi biasanya, sangkut d mana2) then baru ada line. tu pun cuma bole receive msg. kalo org call, alihkn tmpt fon, abes la ilang line. yg lain2 mcm Maxis or Tunetalk sori byk2 la. x ada line langsung. huarghhhh. so mau x mau kena la pakai Digi juga. n tpksa la langgan tenet juga utk new fon ni, sbb kn skg dh jarang org msg guna msg biasa. mst mau yg pcuma mcm whatsapp, line or kakaotalk. (sy pakai ketiga2 ni hewhehwhwh) 014 XXX 4342.  Digi ni guna plan buddy ntah something2. alaa yg 3 nombor pcuma call n sms ever. number yg kena setting mst la B, mummy, daddy. heheh

k la. dats all. babaiiiiiiiiii.

::happy bday to me n my nephew::

hi! hi!

hehehe. 'happy bday to me'.

pdhal da berlalu 10 hari lepas kot. belated. lmbt btl mau update dlm blog. almaklumlah, busy bebeno. weekdays sebok dkt skola, weekends sebok dgn suami (oops! =p). hahaha. minggu lps mmg bz. petang isnin n selasa muka berulang alik ke PPD. ada hal. then rabu br free. khamis turun lg gotong royong psdiaan majlis ramah ramah aidilfitri prgkt PPD, then petang jumaat majlis ramah tamah yg x berapa mau ramah tu. tensi nama x dipanggil2 utk cabutan tiket bertuah LOLS. xda luck huuuuuuuuuuuuuu

ok. ok. walaupun dah tua bangka (sedeh -______-), da keja, da kwen, jgn x tau i msh smbut bday wkwkwkkwkw. aptb. sorg kwn kat skola sy kata "seumur hidup sy, sy x penah smbut bday,".. and sy pla kata "seumur hidup sy, sy x penah tak sambut bday,". aaaaaahahahahaha lalalalala (perasan forever young smbut bday sweet 16 walopn dat was long time ago. 10 yrs ago kotttttt!!! makkkkkkkk sy dh tua!!!)

ok2. age is just a number. yg penting dlm hati sentiasa rs muda tau. lalalala. bday sy 30/08. kena hari jumaat. alahai wktu skola pula. dh la duk di ceruk pedalaman Swak (pdhal x brp mau pdlmn pun sgt. drama lebeh). tp x kira, apa pun jd, sy kena balik sabah juga! tahun ni bday special tau, sbb smbut dgn suami (wott wott kiteww dh adewww lakiiii), dan anak buah tsyg! mmmuaaahhh to both of u. my nephew Rizq bday pd 4 sept. so x jauh juga la, beza dlm 5 hari camtu. memandangkn bday Wizz pn kena pd weekdays, me and my sist cdg utk clbrte bsama, d Ranau. so sy n B kena blik Miri to Ranau, fam my sis kena blik Twu to Ranau.

sy ni, kalo mau blik Sbh, x puas la kalo blik setakat jumaat-ahad. 2 mlm 3 hari x bbaloi kott pjlnn pulg. so sy ambk CRK utk jumaat, n khamis (29/8) tu da fly blk Sabah wit B. parent ambk d KKIA. jumaatnya kami clbrte bday sesama. (me n Wizz). byk bebeno gambr tp yg ni sy dah pilih2 la utk dimasukkn dlm blog. masukkan semua mmg x mampu lahhhh. hehe. btw kebanykan gambr sy edit dlm btk cinemascope. knp?? ntah la mcm jenis lain x seswai. lalalala~

 Rizq's goodie bag. perghh. dulu2 kita bday, org bg adiah dkt kita. skg ni, kita bday, kita pula bg adiah dkt org kn. doniaaaaaa. doniaaa. haha

 barisan goody bags. kaler black n white. tema wizz ni kungfu panda (coz my sis obsess gila ngan panda)

 cuba ambk gambr tp x mjadi. why u no look at my face wizz. why.

our cakes! kek Wizz perisa .. aa igt sgt da. pelangi kot. (err mcm mn agakny perisa pelangi hihi). mine perisa chocolate moist. all cakes design by my sist

nyummeh..!!

 

mcm ni isi dlm dia. sedapkn.

my sist ckp dia sengaja letak perkataan 'mrs' di sana spy sy sedar diri im not single anymore. da jd 'puan' pun. uhuk2.

ok, d bwh ni gmbr2 sekitar dlm majlis. masuk skli byk, x plh sgt. hehwehhw

peminat2 me n Wizz.

kiddos.

kiddos everywhere, minus d hubby

basic fam.

y me look xcited?

demoksssssssssss, cutestttttttt Wizz!

bsdia la ni mau ptg kek.

baca doa dlu.

nyanyi 'happy bday' and 'Allah selamatkan kamu'

yeayyyyyyyyyyyy potong kekkkkkkk.

ololololo Wizz nanges plaa. haha. dia tkazut kali the kiddos tiup wisel2 bday tu.

ok. skg kami akan wat unformal family photo. mari cuba.

1st - failed. mom's eyes closed.

2nd- failed. Rizq cried.

3rd - failed. Wizz n sis r not looking in front

4th - failed. mom's eyes closed. why mom?

5th - ah! failed ever. too far from cam. kesimpulan, failedddddddd. nanti kita ambk perfect fam pic ya! mcm gmbr with my in law ritu. 

in law fam.

ok, save d last for d best (best la sgt =p). our pictures. me and hubby. lalalalala tpksa digabung2kn sbb agk byk ambk gmbr sendiri. hihi. hubby is fan of Manchester United. so dia belikn sy skli jersi Man.Un. mcm2 kot jersi dia ada. tp yg sy x faham, knp dia ada baju jersi pasukan bola Sarawak, tp sy x penah nmpk dia pakai baju jersi Sabah. y B??? 

gmbr ini bkn sy rotate ke mana2. ia mmg dua gmbr yg bbeza. pose yg sama, cuma di ambk di tempat, masa dan angle yg bbeza.

hehehhehe tu ja la cerita sekitar my bday. Alhamdulillah Allah pinjamkan lg umur sehingga 26 tahun. sambutan bday tahun ni juga lbh bahagia berbanding tahun2 sblmnya. compare tahun lps;

30/08/2012

- student

- engaged

-no nephew

 30/08/2013

- working.

- married to the man i love d most

- with beloved nephew Rizq Hafiey.

Alhamdulillah for e'thing ya Allah. mdh2an kegembiraan dan kebahagiaan ini berterusan utk tahun2 di hadapannya. siapa tahu, tahun dpn akan bersama pula with a baby called my own. (tp mcm blm ja.. hahaha). apa2 pn, jodoh, ajal dan rezeki itu rahsia Allah. anak tu pun termasuk sbg rezeki. ada rezeki Allah bg, alhamdulillah. kalau blm ada, x apa, bersabar n keep praying. 

bye for now. not feeling so well in since last thursday. mula2 demam, pastu batuk selesma. cuaca panas hujan silih bganti bw virus batuk selesma kot. jumaat lps tekak rs perit sgt, igtkn ada tonsil. sblh muka pun rasa berdenyut. sabtu g klinik, doc confirmkn bukan tonsil, cuma tekak bengkak sbb tlalu batuk. muka rs bdenyut sblh pula migrain. gabungn demam+selesma+batuk+migrain (add on haha) mmg agak 'bisa' rasanya. hmm my migrain getting worse. bdenyut dr kening kanan, turun sehingga ke tulang pipi kanan. blkg sblh kepala pun rs sakit. n i think my right eye vision getting worse too. ada connection kot migrain dan rabun mata. so smpai skg makan ubat batuk selesma yg sgt power. makan skli, rs mengantuk dtg meluap2. smpaikn x igt langsung ada bckap di fon tetengah malam. ahahahahaha

k, adios. pray for my speed recovery pls ; ) lots of work waiting to be done. huuuuuuu